I’m a person with a strong sense of destiny. It crystallized 2 years ago with training I did with a Teacher in Thailand.
It’s almost indescribable.

One night I was sleeping and I woke suddenly to someone calling my name–loudly. In the darkness of my room I realized that the voice calling me, was my own.
That was an unbelievably uplifting moment.
I was flooded with one could call visions but I hesitate to call them that because of the images that would become attached to that label.

I tell you, I couldn’t sleep. Things have been slowly falling into place since then. I trust myself completely. There is no rush, but it is good to know when to move.

I have encountered opposition. I’ve learned to keep things quiet, because simply put there are people close to me who don’t understand at all where I am coming from.
As well, I feel like there is some dissipation of potency when I just blab willy nilly about what I experience on an the esoteric level. My relationship with my Destiny is what it is, and for some odd reason there are people in my life, who, if I were to talk about it, think t is something up for debate.

You can’t debate the existence of someone’s internal life. It is what it is. If that means I don’t talk to anyone about it, I’m more than okay with that–in fact I prefer it.

When you find it, it’s like suddenly swimming with a strong tide after having been trying to swim against it for a long time — exhilerating and a rush, and suddenly you find yourself getting somewhere with more energy than you thought you had behind you. Dodging the river rocks (obstacles) can be a bit tricky because they come up fast and hard, but when you know you’re doing what you need to do, it’s worth the risk.

I’m currently in this situation. For me, there’s also a profound sense of gratitude that I’ve found what I need to do in this life. For quite a while now, I’ve felt like I’ve been flailing, unsure where I need to be and what I need to do, only knowing that what I’m currently doing isn’t fulfilling me. Some months ago, I sat down and really took a long heart-looking, soul-searching moment and determined what I NEED in order to feel fulfilled — once I really looked at that, the decision to go in this direction was so painfully obvious that there was no way I could miss it. And when I said, “This is what I’m going to do…” well, like I said, it was like I stopped fighting against the current, and things have been falling into place with stunning rapidity.

I have an interview on Friday which, should I be offered the position, removes the last obstacle that I can currently see. It also puts me in the career field (healthcare) that I want to be in while I’m getting the education I need for the career itself.

I’ve been called to serve in whatever capacity life needs me. It’s frustrating because there was never an epiphany: “Thou shalt be a lawyer” or a nurse or an artist or what have you; it’s never been that clear-cut. But you know, since I accepted that I’m just an on-call, generally smart and skilled person here to serve, I’m never at a loss of random situations to rescue. So at least there’s that.

Oh. Unless you count my mom, who would like me to take the Trophy Wife path like she did. But she doesn’t count.

yes. but following it is like searching out bread crumbs. every once in a while i get a strong need to go do one thing or another. and i follow it.

usually.
sometimes i think i should have just tried to make a living painting. but i think maybe the obstacles to that are part of the process. (my saturn/venus & neptune/venus at work, i think.)

Rainie, what a cool comment. I’ve always wanted to see that movie. Maybe now’s the time!

I just had this experience where I’ve been looking and looking to serve - should I do it here or there or here? And I am going to work at a crises hotline center, but I just had a client - a woman I met at a writers group - come to me and say, “I’ve written these stories about grief and when I met you, I knew I can trust you to help me with them.” (I’m a writing coach and editor) and so I was like wow, I’d be honored.

But my point is that sometimes to be on the path you can just like BE and not even have to do anything. You’re already right there.