Open Question: Mars! How Do You Deal With And Dissipate Your Anger?
Ask the collective
goddess writes:
“What helps people deal with anger? I don’t get angry all that often, but one of the absolute best things I can do when I’m feeling angry is to clean the house. That helps more than anything else I’ve found, including other types of physical activity. My Mars is in the 4th, trine Saturn. Energetic cleaning leaves me both feeling free of the agitation and satisfied at the accomplishment when I’m through.”
goddess - Being ultra-Marsy, I work out regularly (daily if possible) and I on top of that I walk if I can. With Mars conjunct Mercury, I also write and write and write…
What do other people do to dissipate anger, and can you see it in your Mars?
27 Responses to “Open Question: Mars! How Do You Deal With And Dissipate Your Anger?”
mars in leo in the 4th, sextile saturn, cleaning works for me. Telling someone what is the matter, so I can stratigize about what to do (mars conjunct mercury) helps too, as does writing about it and getting clear that way. If I can be alone, getting out of the house, taking a long walk to clear my head, maybe see or feel something new. (mars sextile uranus)
Clean! Clean! Clean! It’s so automatic. I start cleaning like a mad woman! Mars in Cancer. If the house is already clean, the next best thing for me is reading, burying my face in a book. Usually a philosophical self-help book. Mars in the 9th.
Could it not fit any better??
Mars in Sag. I work out like a madwoman with weights, take aggressive 2 hour bike rides. I need to move and sweat and play hard.
I’ve got Mars in Leo, 8th house. Anger is very problematic for me, being a 70% yin type of man. I don’t know for sure, but I suppress I mostly, try overtly not to express it, because it more or less destroys my whole world and relationshops when it does come out in an unmodulated way, kind of Donald Duck style, that is.
Mostly I’m angry when I see other people behaving in what I perceive to be thoughtless or otherwise stupid ways. I’m old enough to know better, but, not.
I could use some advice on this, I think. Professional advice, probably, but feel free to put in your 2 cents.
Mars in Sag conjunct Neptune. Music dissiaptes my anger. I either dance it out (even if its just dancing in my room with the music loud)or playing either my piano or guitar.
Just listening to music helps settle me but if my body needs something physical to do its dancing or playing an instrument.
Mars in Leo here in the 9th or 10th depending on how you slice the pie.
I grew up in a household where anger was never to be expressed in any shape size or form.(9 kids, double Libra mum with a 5 foot cane… if you ever doubted Saturn’s exaltation in Libra, I have a story or two to tell)
I’m a water sign with a Pluto Mars conjunction. On the relatively rare occasions that I am angry, the whole world knows I’m angry without that I say a single word.
When I say a word, grown men have been known to wet themselves.
If I write when I am angry, it is usually devastating.
I learned, relatively late in life as these things go, to visualize the object of my anger and rant over the ether.
It requires some significant practice in meditation.
Its a way of letting it all go without razing everything in line of sight.
I usually exit the exercise with a far more balanced perspective than I had when I entered it.
Its a lot healthier than bottling it up, or getting arrested.
My 2 cents
Rod
I have Mars in 12th and if I’m really, really pissed off, I move furniture. Technically cleaning, but not really since I don’t get the concept of “clean” (pisces on the 6th…).
If it’s minor anger, writing and/or staying awake until I’m exhausted and have no choice but to sleep.
rod, i hear ya. mars square pluto here (can-lib). dealing with anger productively is something i’ve had to learn. the first step for me is always to vent and then strategize with a trusted friend. (maybe that’s mars sextile saturn in the 7th/8th?) i really benefit from an outside perspective, b/c the strength of the emotion usually clouds my judgement. i also have mars trine uranus but i don’t know what that suggests astrologically wrt anger….?
I need to vent and vent and vent, complain, yell and ensure that someone, anyone understands that I’m right to be angry. I get extremely restless and can’t be alone. Mars Libra/7th house, square moon.
I get angry often, at stupid little unnerving things. lol But with Mars in Libra, I’m not very good at expressing it. Usually exercise helps and doing other things that give me pleasure instead of nerves. Also my Mars is close to the Descendant and it helps to talk about it with someone - poor people that have to listen!
Mars in Leo in the 6th house; Mars Trine Saturn, Mars Conjunct both Sun & Moon, both in Leo and the 6th house: I lift heavy objects when angry. Preferably made of steel & iron.
Mars in Capricorn (trine Taurus Asc)when angry I do some serious gardening to exhaust myself. Dig holes, pull weeds, lug heavy pots around and mulch, it can be very rewarding.
I have Mars in Cancer, on the Midheaven.
When I get angry, I find that cooking soothes me. Things like Chicken Caligula, Beef Borgia, Forest Mushroom Omelete, or Spring Bamboo Soup. Nothing like a tasty meal to soothe over hurt feelings. Mmmmm.
When I’m angry I go for a walk. The longer the better. I find being alone is the best route, as I get better insight than all the chatter from other people.
It’s the weirdest thing, but if I talk to anyone about what I’m feeling angry about, 9 times out of 10 they IMMEDIATELY try to micro-manage and give me advice and it only pisses me off further. I need a rant…not advice.
I think this is my Cap Moon in the 1st…people act, when I’m angry, as if I need to learn how to be emotionally competent and it is so draining. Projection, projection…
I do not lack in the area of personal reflection, so I simply ask the Universe to upturn what rock my insight is hidden under…
And it sounds crazy but I can simply decide to not be angry anymore and not be. I don’t want to get sick and I’m definitely the kind of person who would become ill if angry, so there you go.
kashmiri- sometimes i can decide not to be angry too, but sometimes it doesn’t work. this was on my mind because the day before i had gotten pissed off the night before and could not sleep worth a damn. same crap going around and around in my head. so i got up at midnight and cleaned my house.
it’s been very interesting for me to read the comments and to see how people’s coping is tied into their astrology.
i dance. or listen to music (certain kinds, particularly)
which works quite nicely for pisces mars.
goddess, well I didn’t mention the times when I just completely lose my shit and am basically like a hot knife through butter (Aries Mars opposed Pluto).
As for not being able to sleep I guess I could admit to screaming into my pillow until I rip my tonsils apart, thrashing around, crying until I collapse in exhaustion.
Shhhhhh….don’t tell anyone! That’s for very special occasions! LOL!
Oh yes, and I just paid $15 for the tailor to replace the zipper I ripped out of my favorite jeans in a rage. obviously I jusy need to have more sex ::::rolls eyes::::
Scorpio Mars conjunct the moon. I cry. I turn it all on myself and get really twisted up. I take some time to walkabout and speak with my one friend who guides me out the mess. Then I can speak my truth to that which created the anger. I cannot go there directly or, if I do, the emotion that accompanies the anger is totally destructive. So I have learnt to wait until I am ready to give them my Mars. If my moon is involved I am a crazy woman. People usually don’t give you the time to process though and I would like to discover a way to not have to control my moon, but rather be truthful to it and my feelings.
lol at kashmiri…i hope your special occassions don’t come often. that sounds exhausting!
and i think sex is a good antidote for me, too. (mars in scorp). so long as i’m not angry at my husband, at least. fortunately, that doesn’t happen often. 
Mars In Gemini conjunct the Midheaven. When I am angry I will verbally rip someone a new anal orifice. The mellowing with age seems to be messed up, since I am a lot more angry as I have aged.
Maybe it is just that I am no longer projecting that part of myself. However I do feel that swinging to the other end of the pendulum is not a very good thing either. I am working to get back to a more middle ground. And I do think that what Kashmiri said is likely very valid! 
Daemoness have you thought about Pluto through Sagittarius, through the last 12/ish years…opposing your natal Mars, maybe that influences of feeling more angry as you’ve aged, as you put it?
“When I am angry I will verbally rip someone a new anal orifice”
Hey…are they people from work? (MC) or people from home? (IC) Just out of curiosity.
Kashmiri
That is a good point about Pluto. Everything is different than the way I expected my life to be. This isn’t a great thang for a Taurus. However I have to say that I do feel empowered getting to where I am today, because I know I can rely on me. I hope I don’t sound bitter, but likely do, it seems that everyone I have ever loved has let me down, with the exception of my Gran who passed away years ago and my animals.
To answer the question about work, I rarely have a problem there anymore. They know what to expect if they are dealing unfairly and don’t have their facts straight. It wasn’t always that way and felt like a war zone for years.
What will get me very angry is unfairness, double standards, or lies. This is across the board, so it applies anywhere.
I just recently wrote a paper on how I deal with my anger for psych class.
In case anyone’s forgotten ;), I’ve got Mars-Venus-Pluto conjunct in Libra/4 and it hits everything in my chart. I have to channel my anger somehow or, like kashmiri and Astrosage/Rod have said, I get sick. I’ve learned I need to have a variety of responses depending on depth of anger and my surroundings.
I’ve used meditation to help dissipate the energy since I was a kid and I’ve learned that expressing the small annoyances as they happen is invaluable to keeping me on an even keel. Sometimes it’s not enough, though, especially when severe anger springs up suddenly. When that happens, I used to take my anger out on inanimate objects: screaming into pillows, throwing things (especially phones), slamming doors (sometimes repeatedly until it was emphatic enough). Lately I’ve been using deep, controlled breathing to focus myself until I can think it through using Rabbi Schmuley’s maxim: Is it worth fighting about and, if so, is it worth fighting about now? If I’m no longer in control of myself (which has happened a few times), I don’t want anyone to see me being emotional (Aquarian moon. Dang!), or I don’t want to fight, I’ll leave — go for a walk if I can and sequester myself if I can’t.
Whew! That makes me exhausted just thinking about and typing it all. *lol*
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With Virgo Mars in the 12H, I don’t get angry enough! Or at least it’s not expressed. It feels really good to let it out. I once wrote a journal entry full of variations of f*** and complained about everything and it was amazingly liberating.
And this might sound bad, but I also let people/strangers have it when they are aggressive to me, which is fairly new behavior. Very direct and “stop right here” and they’re not getting away with it. I used to be afraid of being seen as obnoxious or grating or not nice. Now I just don’t care.