You Be The Judge - 49 Year Old Lori Drew Drives 13 Year Old To Kill Herself

29 Responses to “You Be The Judge - 49 Year Old Lori Drew Drives 13 Year Old To Kill Herself”

1. shell says on 6/17/08 at 7:04 am:
   

   I saw this case on Primetime or 20/20, one of those, a while back. I feel sooo bad for the girl’s family who hung herself.
   I can’t believe how immature this mother was to stoop to this high school level. She definitely taught her daughter the wrong way of handling things. She should be held accountable for sure.

2. Amber says on 6/17/08 at 8:14 am:
   

   How can she plead not guilty to the charge of ‘conspiracy to inflict emotional distress’?! What else could you call it? Guilty, guilty, guilty. What is she going to say in court: that it was just a bit of joking around, no bad intentions?! Of course, this is the tip of the ice-berg & is visible because it had such awful consequences. People should be wiser but they are not - in cases in which adults take advantage of children I think it should be punished by law. Amongst adults- different story.

3. kashmiri says on 6/17/08 at 8:25 am:
   

   Guilty. I’m all for people being held accountable for abusive behaviour.

4. Tam says on 6/17/08 at 9:22 am:
   

   I find her guilty as charged. Bullying and belittling people is cronic in the U.S. It will be interesting to see how she tries to justify her behavior in court.

5. satori says on 6/17/08 at 9:31 am:
   

   people accused of minor crimes (sometimes just being associated with someone else’s major crime) do major time because of the minimum manditory sentences for drug cases. minimums are the debil but I could really see it in crimes against children.

   thumbs down on this horrid chit. maybe they’ll find drugs on her at her sentencing.

6. seekingzen says on 6/17/08 at 9:36 am:
   

   She did a horrible thing to a child… It wasn’t an accident, it was intentional and malicious. I don’t know that the law they’re using is appropriate (I would have to read up on it) but I do think she should face some sort of punishment. The girl is dead because this bitch was getting off on being nasty.

7. Loonsounds says on 6/17/08 at 10:03 am:
   

   If they can prove for sure that she did that, I think she should serve some time in jail. Set an example for these damn hackers and Internet abusers.

8. mudlikesubstance says on 6/17/08 at 10:10 am:
   

   I’ve always been left with a question around this case. Did the girl who is dead torment that woman’s daughter? Was she being an overprotective mother?

   Given, she should not get off lightly but how long was this going on and was she just doing it for fun and curiosity or to protect her child and didn’t keep her own moral compass in that process? I don’t know if that mitigates any of her behavior but I’ve always wondered…

9. satori says on 6/17/08 at 10:13 am:
   

   why is there always someone that pops up, in any discussion that involves victimization, to ask IF THE VICTIM DESERVED IT?

   I don’t think that merits a response.

10. Charlotte says on 6/17/08 at 10:36 am:
    

    Man, this is just a horrible case. I was reading about it, the messages sent to the girl were just evil–one said the “world would be better without her in it”, so it wasn’t just a rejection from some “boy”, it was belittling her very personhood. Teenage girls can be vicious and can do some awful things to each other but mothers are supposed to be the mature, guiding, checking influence and this one wasn’t; she obviously never grew up. I don’t think anyone can force people to be good parents or even good people, but they sure should be punished them when they do something shittastic like this.

11. Elsa says on 6/17/08 at 10:57 am:
    

    Well the soldier said last night if the 13 year old was his daughter he would kill this woman -doesn’t care what the courts say. Then I said, “20 years” and he thought that would be okay but get this:

    He equated this to TREASON. The woman KNOWS what it is like, how fragile a girl is at that age. “She knew it would happen,” he said.

    He may be over the edge with that statement but if he is, it’s not by far.

    Keep in mind we are Lori Drew’s age peers which means we have a pretty good idea what a person knows and does not know at this age.

12. mudlikesubstance says on 6/17/08 at 11:16 am:
    

    Satori,

    I’m guessing you’re responding to my comments. Please calm down. I was NOT asking if the victim deserved it. I was looking for the motivations of the mother. Different motivations mean different levels of punishment.

    I am curious as to more of the story. How did it get started, what were the warning signs, where did the mother miss the red flags, what were her motivations.

    The victim doesn’t deserve it but what happened previously may play into the mother’s motivations and may indeed mean a harsher sentence.

13. PixieDust says on 6/17/08 at 12:10 pm:
    

    I’ve been following this and I want this woman to suffer, I get so mad my hands are shaking. She did this to a CHILD, to a teenage GIRL who was already emotionally fragile. And she did it in the nastiest, cuntiest way imaginable–luring her in through her emotions with the fictitious boy, preying on her insecurities, then delivering a precise, deadly final shot that destroyed her psyche.

    I have no pity for her, because she has no remorse for what she did. In fact, she is arrogant about the whole thing, defends what she did; I want her annihilated. The girl died, the parents split up because of this tragedy, the people in the town kept quiet for a long time–it is pure insanity.

    If she did this to my kid, she and HER children would be dead. I don’t know that I could hold back from killing them. Thinking about my kid’s final moments of despair and mental anguish to the point of suicide? Can you IMAGINE that?? Not to be dramatic, but how could I not avenge that kind of suffering???

14. SuSu says on 6/17/08 at 12:32 pm:
    

    I’m glad I’m not the judge.

    There are numerous pitfalls inherent in blaming one person for the choices and actions of another.

    On the other hand, conspiracies of lies and emotional manipulation are abhorrent.

    Fortunately, law is less ambiguous than cosmic justice. They’ll sort it out and the case will set legal precedents for future cases.

15. Loonsounds says on 6/17/08 at 12:44 pm:
    

    Well, if the girl was seriously tormenting this woman’s daughter, and if the mother felt her kid could not hold her own for some reason, there is such a thing called a restraining order. Ya know?

    Maybe they can’t pin this whack job of a mommy figure with first degree murder but I do see what they call ‘malice aforethought.’ Maybe she didn’t intend for the girl to die, maybe that was her intention, some people are that mean.

    Maybe she will be charged, at the least, with involuntary manslaughter which, I hope, holds a very lengthy jail sentence.

16. Elsa says on 6/17/08 at 12:46 pm:
    

    I think all they have is the Internet stuff which is another reason it is interesting. You have to follow the law - It’s the law. And this woman did not murder the girl so there is no murder charge that I heard of. It’s like she accessed her 4 times so 4 charges each have a max 5 year term…

17. Elsa says on 6/17/08 at 12:48 pm:
    

    Susu - you make good point and I considered them as well. I should say the soldier’s views are not mine, I just think they are interesting. “Treason”. A woman turning on her own kind?

    I really loathe women who target other women (search shadow side of women on this blog) so it sets me off in that way. It is such a betrayal.

18. Jilly says on 6/17/08 at 12:51 pm:
    

    It’s hard to win the award for Official Worstest Human Being On The Internet but … her birthday is 3/31/1959, according to the police report.

19. goddess says on 6/17/08 at 12:54 pm:
    

    i don’t really know what “should” be done. i just know it’s very, very sad…

20. Elsa says on 6/17/08 at 12:58 pm:
    

    goddess - agreed. I would not like to be the judge sitting on this AT ALL.

21. Elsa says on 6/17/08 at 1:06 pm:
    

    Thanks, Jilly. She has a Gemini Mars (and attacked via Mercury method) and a Saturn Moon conjunction in Capricorn.
    Pluto squares Saturn and probably the Moon as well COLD and CRUEL in this case.

    Saturn also sq Sun Mercury in Aries… this is simply not a nice person.

22. Loonsounds says on 6/17/08 at 1:08 pm:
    

    The main issue is that this kid is a minor. That is going to be very serious for this woman.

    I believe that there will be both civil and criminal charges. I believe that the family will sue the crap out of anyone around this woman who has money, hopefully there is some deep pocket insurance company.

    The criminal action will likely be a tort action. There is a definite cause of action and definite damages. A case of wrongful death.

    The criteria for judging a tort case is “Did this woman know, or should she have known, that this could be an outcome of her actions.”

    So, even claiming that she didn’t know it would happen will not help her in this tort as a case can be made that she should have known.

    Her own daughter, presumably, is also a minor, and basically, so basically, she involved another minor, her own kid, in a conspiracy to commit damage to another minor vis a vis mind fucking.

    Someone mentioned prescedent getting set, and I think that is absolutely true. I don’t see it as dissimilar to involving a minor in pornography vis a vis the Internet, yet the damages were even worse.

    Some of you wouldn’t want to be the judge. I wouldn’t want to be the woman. I think she’s going to jail, and may also lose custody of her own kid for a while.

23. Jilly says on 6/17/08 at 1:14 pm:
    

    brrrrrrr

24. wyrdling says on 6/17/08 at 1:20 pm:
    

    yeah, i remember reading about this when they were still trying to figure out what grounds to charge the woman on.

    it’s bad enough when teenage girls pull this stuff, but some of those teenage girls don’t grow out of it. and those have the experience to get really brutal.
    mean, i’ve always wondered where cruel little women learned their trade? do they grow it or do they pick it up from someone in their lie?

    teenagers can be so frighteningly frail. this just makes me sad. and angry.

25. SuSu says on 6/17/08 at 1:48 pm:
    

    Yikes, how do I unsub from email for this. My inbox is filling up.

26. JS says on 6/17/08 at 2:16 pm:
    

    I’ll start by saying that if I was this child’s mother, I would have an incredibly difficult time not employing the soldier’s solution. Gotta love the rule of law. Saves us all from time to time.

    The Jezebel blog has done a pretty good job of covering this case; they were one of the first blogs I saw to break the story nationally. The site is www.jezebel.com. While you’re there, if you do a search under “Lori Drew” or “Megan Meier” you can get many more details on the back-story as compared to what I’ve seen from more mainstream sources.

    From a legal standpoint, I think they’ve got to be careful of hanging any of this on computer access/use to try and come up with an easier way to prosecute, or a more ‘precedent-setting’ way. Those precedents can have unintended effects for all of us. If I were the prosecutor, I would stay away from it. The defense can and will use it as a way out, or at least to deflect from the real issue. I’ve seen cases get too focused on the “tool” that injured someone as opposed to the process and intent behind the overall case. It isn’t the access (authorized or otherwise) to MySpace that killed Megan. It was potentially the actions of Lori Drew. If you can demonstrate that Lori Drew had prior knowledge of Megan’s emotional state, and/or willfully and intentionally set out to harm her, I think there’s enough out there to start to build a solid case. However, I don’t necessarily see major sentencing coming from it, unless there’s more information out there. My concern is that that the defense, media, etc., would start to focus on the computer access/speech/cyber-bullying/communication aspect. That would be opposed to simplifying this down to what it really is…an adult intentionally causing abusive and grievous harm to a child that was both consistent and repetitive, which resulted in the child’s death. At the same time, the adult potentially had prior knowledge the child was under doctor’s care for mental illness. THAT you can prosecute, but you’ve got to be able to prove consistency, prior knowledge, and intent to do harm.

27. Carielle says on 6/17/08 at 9:28 pm:
    

    In a sense, what this woman did is very similar to what an online pedophile does. She “created” an online persona to target, lure, and ultimately damage a young person for her own pleasure or sense of satisfaction. That her method was to damage the girl emotionally rather than physically doesn’t make it less obscene in my eyes.

    If the children involved in this (the woman’s child and the victim) had issues that couldn’t be resolved, an emotionally mature parent would deal with in a far different manner. There is no excuse for someone to do something like this.

    Even if the end result had not been suicide, the motives and actions of this mother were intended to screw with the girl’s emotions. And that is just sick.

28. Conny says on 6/17/08 at 11:06 pm:
    

    It is especially important to educate children and teenagers about the fact that abusive people use all kind of “tools” to approach their victims. If my daughter was emotionally unstable I would not allow her to play dating games on MySpace, and in either case I would tell and remind her not to believe everything she reads there. It would also be a good subject to discuss at school, in case parents missed to do it. The less potential victims the less chances for the perpetrators.

29. ZZ says on 6/24/08 at 1:27 pm:
    

    Totally innocent. This woman never approached or said one word to the girl. Calling typing some words on a keyboard a crime is ridiculous.

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