May
12

Should You Marry Someone With A Strongly Commitment-Phobic Chart? Uranus In The 7th House: Astrology-Based Advice

Dear Elsa,

Recalling your comments about your seventh house Uranus and how quickly people decided they wanted to marry you, what would you suggest to someone who was thinking of marrying a seventh house Uranus person?

Not that I’m wanting to right now, but the idea is eerily appealing considering I’m the kind of girl who never expected to want to marry anyone ever. But for some reason, this person doesn’t provoke the “eek! marriage!” effect.

Aries
United States

aries ramDear Aries,

First I would say if you are attracting someone with Uranus in the 7th house, you are probably somewhat commitment-phobic yourself and sure enough, I see a tight aspect between Venus (7th house) and Uranus. Never mind you are an independent Aries with a detached Aquarius Moon!  But to answer your question, I think it is fine to marry someone with Uranus in the 7th house and you may even be able to stay that way if you give them lots of space.

You will have to deal with their impulses, which becomes possible when you can deal with your own impulses. And these relationships to tend to work best when there is regular separation.

The example that comes to mind is astrologer Stephen Arroyo’s remarks in one of his books.  For a time, he worked near an Army post and had a lot of Army wives as clients. He states he could not help but notice 70% of the women had Uranus in the 7th, so you see how this worked for them: their husbands were not around interfering with their freedoms.

Closer to home, when the soldier and I were together as kids, he went to work for 24 hours and then was home for 48 or some such schedule. This meant I could look forward to his leaving LOL and of course more recently, he has been driving a truck!

What we will do now remains to be seen but we will have to do something because like you, he has Venus in aspect to Uranus himself and the energy is going to play one way or the other.

Bottom line, I would say marriage to a Venus Uranus person should be avoided unless you are highly independent yourself.  But this is no negative reflection on the person with this exchange. You should also not marry someone really horny unless you like to screw, right?

If you like eccentrics who are unpredictable in love, if you do not wish to be bored and you can provide your own sense of security, then Venus Uranus is probably your ticket.

Good luck.

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7 Responses to “Should You Marry Someone With A Strongly Commitment-Phobic Chart? Uranus In The 7th House: Astrology-Based Advice”

  1. Gem says on 5/12/08 at 10:00 am:

    I have uranus in 7H and my SO travels quite a bit for work so I find that my alone time is still available to me. I honestly don’t mind seeing him everyday, but I do not like to feel obligated to share every last bit of me. I really can’t stand talking about inconsequential things or be asked by my SO who just called me. In my chart I feel that my 7H uranus expresses as a need for autonomy and an hour of alone time daily. It’s not in aspect to venus, but it does aspect most every personal planet otherwise :-)

    Oh and we are getting married…but I am not in my twenties either…

  2. Becca says on 5/12/08 at 10:23 am:

    I’ve got Venus conjunct Uranus, and I’ve always said that if I ever got married it would have to be to someone like an offshore oilman. One week at home, three weeks at work: sounds good to me.

  3. Jennifer says on 5/12/08 at 7:49 pm:

    Hm. I have no Venus/Uranus and Uranus rising, but to some degree I always date someone who can’t be around 24-7. (Usually they live somewhere else or have to be out of town a lot.) Maybe it’s an Aries SN thing? I don’t know, but I like it when there’s an excuse for the guy not to be around so I can do my own thing on occasion.

  4. Aries says on 5/12/08 at 8:46 pm:

    Yeah, I guess I could have snapped to that Venus/Uranus bit. I have difficulty grasping inconjuncts most days. Guess that’s part of how they work.

    Looks like it’s flowing the way this stuff wants to, then. Thanks for the perspective! It’s been really weird but if anything would work, this kind of disjointedness just might. I was worried I’d been bit by a sudden piece of the crazy ;)

  5. Aries says on 5/12/08 at 8:50 pm:

    I maybe input my birth data wrong… I always get Venus in the 8th. It’s only seven degrees from the cusp so I guess it could depend on what house system you use? Not that that really affects the main point of this… I think?

  6. Lis says on 5/13/08 at 5:21 am:

    I will proclaim it loud and far: I NEED MY SPACE!

    When I was younger, I wanted to be in a close, long-term relationship, and that wasn’t happening. My relationships were either short, on-and-off, or just not happening.

    When I finally found someone who wanted to be with me all the time, I thought, “I can’t do this.” I felt smothered.

    My husbands Uranus is exactly conjunct my Venus, and I have a Venus/Uranus conjunction. We both go off and do our own thing. I finally figured out and got what I wanted–a relationship and lots of space at the same time. ;)

  7. Heather M. says on 5/13/08 at 9:28 am:

    Uranus/Scorpio right on the descendant so I deal with this independence factor too. My husband has Uranus in the first house conjunct Pluto (totally intense) and he also has that great need for independence. We go from time together to time apart all the time, mostly with the mundane daily stuff of juggling work, kids, and each of our widely varied passions.

    Totally Uranian and unpredictable.

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