“I would like you to put your hands on my waist,” I told the soldier. “Hurry, while I still have one.”

“Oh, P, you have always had a waist. Even when you yelled at me for getting you fat you still had a waist. When you said the buttons were popping off you uniform?”

“I remember.”

“Well I’ve popped buttons off my shirt and I still knew I had a waist.”

Confused, I just shook my head and changed the subject.