The soldier called within 5 minutes to ask me if I wanted to come out and wait in the truck wash line as it can take hours to get your truck washed. He was trying to peace-make which I appreciated but I saw no sense going out there when I could not return the gesture. It seemed a better idea I maintain the space because I was working on a deep level that was productive for me.

I was thinking about what I had written on my blog about going down in a well. I was thinking how good I am at this. I have spent my whole like in a well and I was thinking I ought to go on my blog and tell people how this is best done because I do know.

For example if you forget the panic and realize you are somewhere very dark… if you can accept this then your eyes will in fact adjust to the light down there and you will see all kinds of things lying around. It’s brilliant in the dark, I would say. There are so many useful things there, it’s “unfathomable” and these things just can’t be gotten anywhere else. So when the soldier called I was thinking these kinds of things after a medium long drive and just saw no reason to go out and care-take him.

It was this but I also felt I was acting in his best interest as well. I mean if I were to go out there against my will I would end up even madder eventually and who do you think that would be directed at? The man with his Mercury opposite mine?

“I am doing something,” I said. “I am going to so something and then I will probably come out there. Truck wash line, right?’

“Yep.”

“Okay, well I will be able to find you. I will do it in a little bit.”

*click

I hung up but I made note of the fact I appreciated his un-baby-ness. One thing about the soldier, he can always, always take care of himself and he also does not punish you for weird things. He has excellent boundaries which meant I could do what I did and feel confident he would not read anything into it. We were waiting to fight it out (or not) and now we were waiting a little while longer… that was all and no big deal and added on chaos.

Part of this is faith by the way. Perhaps if he is patient and respects my process, I will work this out and there will be no fight.

I am the same kind of person and can tell you this goes a very long way in getting along with others. Seems the least you can do if you love someone… give them some time. Respect their process and their inner clock because so often time is on your side.

to be continued