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Voice of Saturn - Mine
Astrology in real life
The soldier last night on the phone…
“How are you doing, P?”
“Same thing. I am trying to navigate all this. I am very aware this is one of the worst times of my life. I don’t think there could be a much worse thing to go through but I am doing it bit by bit and trying to catch the nuance while I am at it.”
He didn’t say anything.
“Like all this Iran hostage stuff. If going back over this teaches anything at all it’s that your life and what you are doing and what is happening around you is significant whether you realize it or not. It’s very important how you handle yourself and you should probably notice as much as you can.”
“Yeah.”
“Yeah, because this is your life and it adds up to something hopefully. If you pay attention. And you and I don’t have all that much life left when you think about it. We aren’t going to be around that much longer.”
“Nope.”
“Yeah, so I figure I may as well take it in, as much as I can, the good and bad because it doesn’t make much difference what is is. It’s all related anyway. I mean, I know it is bad and going to be bad probably forever but I just feel accepting and I am trying to do well anyway because I am too old to be a punk.”
How aware are you of time as it passes?
15 Responses to “Voice of Saturn - Mine”
ACUTELY aware. It’s always, always in the back of my mind that half my life is over, how fast the first half went by, and how important every single moment is from here on out. I’m now aware of the seed-planting potential of every single human interaction in my daily life. Seeds for me, and seeds for them.
You know, I work in a hospital, where nobody goes unless there’s something disturbing happening, unless someone’s having a baby, and even then, something profound and life-changing is going on. Countless of these visitors and patients pass me in the halls and it’s absolutely my duty to radiate something positive and hopeful to them in that space.
And my daughter is growing up so fast. Every minute with her counts. She’s eight, which is an amazing age of curiosity and discovery, and I know that no matter how good of a mom I try to be, one day the dynamics of our relationship will change, so I savor these seconds as they unfold.
Life is beautiful, short as it is.
Elsa: Do you care about words left out (making the sentence sound kind of awkward)? Couple of sentences in this post where that happens–
first paragraph:
“I don’t think there could be much worse”
you left out the “a”
“I don’t think there could be a much worse…”
Last paragraph:
“going to bad”
You left out the “be”
“going to be bad”
I’ll stop if you want. Blame it on my Virgo, okay?
moonpluto - no don’t stop. I should take more care and I am learning this aren’t I?
::smiles::
Fuckin’ fuck Saturn in Virgo, motherfuckin’ fuck!
Swearing in the comments doesn’t count. this is my rule. And re-reading this comment it occurs to me I might be horny which of course comes as no surprise.
Gah. And people wonder why I prefer to be dead.
::rolls eyes:::
Okay cool–
Will let you know when I see them.
Must be your mercury mars conjunction. You write very fast–
But have no fear, I won’t go anywhere near your commas LOL
Oh, rilly? I was a copy editor in a recent past life, and though typos kind of stand out to me in general, yours just seem to add to your blog’s character, like a gray hair or a laugh line. I mean, we always know what you mean; nothing’s obfuscated because of an errant vowel. Not really sure why I don’t mind them so much here. Maybe just because I like you so much.
moonpluto - Yeah, I talk like that. I can’t really help it, I’m a storyteller not a writer. One of these days I am going to quit this shit for sure! I have written tens of thousands of pages and one of these days I will write my last, yes?
I live in hope.
Good night.
i’m glad swearing in the comments doesnt’ count because i did some of that, and then wondered if i should have.
sounds kinda saturn in virgo.
Actually the typos made me think she was Russian when I first read her blog. 
Every so often something snaps me back into life and I realize, this ain’t no dress rehearsal. It helps me when my Libra wants to waffle or hang back — you just have to do what you gotta/wanna do. It makes me appreciate what I have, when I have it. And it makes me remember that shit will pass, because time isn’t forever, thank god.
>>>Actually the typos made me think she was Russian when I first read her blog>>
A drunken Russian whore that lies?
ha ha ha! Neptune strikes. I guess i should be glad I trigger the imagination. 
Why does time seems to pass at an ever increasing rate as one grows older?
Before you know it youth fades to gray and you’re just old and in the way. I have a theory about this phenomenon: In childhood when one becomes aware of time and some of its implications, a year, week, day an hour at the age of 10 are a larger expanse of time in one’s life than at 50, relatively speaking. At the tender age of 10 a year is 10 percent, at 50 it is only 2 percent of the aggregate of a lifetime. In retrospect, when gaging our awareness of time passing a year at 10 would seem to pass slowly compared to a year passing at 50.
LTR Dan
Dan, I wonder if it is because people are so worried about growing old??
Am I the only nutbar that consciously aspires to slow down time? The only way for time to seem slower is to live mindfully. I was always in a hurry to grow up (Cap Moon in 1st) so when it finally happened I felt like the oldest person in the world.
I was on my own at 16 and you could not have found an older woman. I’m getting younger as we speak. I really liked your theory!
Kashmiri, Yes, indeed growing old and death are consequences of time. Growing old is a direct correlation to your time is running out! Really it does no good to worry about something you have no control over. So one shouldn’t waste too much time thinking about it and get on with living, I suppose. When you get slowing of time figured out do please let know!
Dan, I know this sounds wacky, but I have definitely slowed down time. I work as a messenger and working with such tight increments (ie. I have 8 minutes to do a/b/c) is a good way for me to practice.
I like to amuse myself and calling it ‘bending time with my mind.’ Time is a relative non-linear concept. Saying that, you still age, so while living mindfully (essentially savouring the moment) will slow time, it won’t slow aging.
And saying that, I still screw up.
On the weekend I fixed my head space and then set out to mindfully do what I needed to do before I left my house. I arrived at my destination early. I’ve practiced this, except with my mind cluttered and stressed out, and arrived at my destination way the hell off base.
My mother is a time-keeper. It used to bug me but now I just joke about it (she’s an Aries and likes to poke fun at herself).
ever since i had a kid… my goodness!
not quite so obviously before that.
it grew more vivid the older i became, in general, though.
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Yes and No. I’m aware of how non-linear time is…so no. I have a written record of my thoughts and feelings since I was about 8 years old…so yes.
This post is so Capricorn, lol