“It’s me,” I said from the car.

“Where are you?”

“Things are going south. Dust storms and there are problems with the helicopters. Caught in a haboob. Did you know about this at the time?”

“No.”

“So you didn’t know something was wrong? There was no talk? You didn’t sense anything?”

“No, there was no talk and no, I didn’t sense anything.”

“Well at some point you must have known.”

“Not really. I did not know about all the problems. I mean I saw the fire. I saw some of what was going on but I didn’t know. I was sitting in front of a screen and that was all.”

“Then when did you know? What did it take for you to realize there was a serious problem… that things had gone seriously and all the way south?”

“Well when they started getting back on the plane, then I knew something was fucked up. They weren’t supposed to get back on the plane but really I didn’t comprehend what had happened until we were all the way back and I saw the bodies. When I saw the burned people coming off the plane, then it hit me and it hit me hard. It made a huge impression, I’ll never forget.”

“I bet.”

“Yeah, remember I told you I wanted to see what it was like to have shrapnel in me? I wanted some metal under my skin, I told you that.”

“I remember. You’ve got some by the way. Plenty of it. (Mars / metal… Saturn / skin) ”

“Yeah I do.”

“Well I do remember you telling me that and I had no idea where it came from.”

“Well this is where it came from. This is where I saw shrapnel for the first time. I saw it all right and I was affected by it.”

“I imagine.”

“Yeah and then we got home and we had left those people there who were dead. And then the Iranians got their bodies, did stuff with them. They dragged them around in the street and I was affected by that too.”

I sighed.

“It all led to me winding up lying in that bed when you came and got me. Get up, you said. You’re drunk but get the fuck up from that bed right now, I’m taking you home!”

I usually laugh when he does my voice but not this time.

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