Saturn is in Virgo and speaking of editing, my book and limiting what you say, a few years ago HQ was helping me put it together. The book is about my life and he came up with the structure for it which I could have never managed on my own courtesy my Saturn Neptune inclinations. Structure to me is just what you read on this blog. It’s all connected - isn’t it obvious? Ha ha ha.

So anyway we were working on this book and while he was thinking things through he noticed a gap in the time line so he called me up and asked me what happened at this point in my life.

“You’re doing this and then you’re doing this other thing and I think this marked a huge change in your life.”

“Yeah?”

“Well how did it happen? How did you transition? We don’t have an explanation for that,” he said, “I think the reader will want this piece.”

“Oh. Okay, well I guess I’ll write it then.” I hung up and went to work.

Turned out to be a horrendous task and a few days later I mentioned this to HQ.

“Why? Did something bad happen?” he asked.

“Er… yeah. It was one of the worst times I ever had in my life,” I said.

“You mean you have had worse times than are already in this book?”

I laughed. “Apparently so. Why?”

“Well if it is going to be bad, don’t bother to write it. If it’s bad, we don’t need it.”

“Er… okay. But what about the reader wondering and all that?” I asked.

“Oh, well they’ll just have to wonder I guess. Because, Elsa?”

“What?”

“If one more bad thing happens to this girl… well I just don’t think people are going to be able to read this book. I think it may be too difficult for them. Difficult emotionally, I mean. This happened to me once. I was reading this book and I was really into the girl who was the lead character.”

“Uh huh?”

“Yeah. I really liked her and then ¾ the way through the book something happened to her. It was something bad and I just couldn’t stand it. I had to put the book down. I had to quit reading it.”

“Oh…”

“Yeah and I think we are in danger of that happening here. Do you realize how bad your life has been?” he asked.

“No, not really. It’s bad, huh?”

“Bad? That’s not really the word for it. Bad does not cover it. I don’t know that there is a word for all you’ve been through. Your life was terrible, Elsa. Don’t get me wrong. I think this is a happy book. The book is happy and it’s funny and it reads well. I just don’t think the reader will be able to handle anything else going wrong for this girl. I think people who read this book are going to like you the way I liked the girl in the other book I read and we are in danger of having them react the way I did and put the book down if something else happens and it is not good so if this bridge you are writing is bad, I think we should leave it out.”

“Well it is bad. I told you it was one of the worst times of my life, I’m sure.”

No comment.

“No bridge then?”

“No bridge.”

“Fine with me,” I said. “I just can’t believe you think my life is bad.”

“Are you kidding me? I don’t see how your life could have been any worse. Elsa, your life has been horrible and I just have one question for you,” he said.

“What’s that?”

“Does anything good ever happen to you?”

“What?”

“In your life? Has anything good ever happened to you in your life?”

I snorted. “I have no idea. I have never thought about it. I am happy. I am way happier than most people I see and it’s always been that way.”

“Uh huh.”

“Yeah, so if this is a terrible life, then I guess it’s terrible. I mean, I am sorry but it is the only life I have.”

“I see. Well you don’t have to write anymore. What you’re working on? Just forget about it,” he said. “So now that you don’t have to work, what are you going to do the rest of the day?”

“Try and figure out if my life is bad, I guess. I really have no idea.”

That was about four years ago. I’m still wondering this.

Have you ever put a book down because it overwhelmed you?