i kind of think that we pick some of it out beforehand, or like a general roadmap, and some of it we create as we go. like our lives are a great big pieces of art, and there’s beauty in all of it, if you look for it.

As an astrologer, I’d say we choose our parents and circumstances. However, i also believe it’s up to us as individuals to work with what we have in a dedicated and creative manner. Saturn sq Sun person here.

Telling ourselves we “choose” our circumstances is a comfort akin to saying “it all happens for a reason” when something senseless happens. Nevertheless, I believe it. That being said, I would consider trading my problems with someone else…just for a week or so.

I don’t pretend to know all the answers, but some things I’m sure of in terms of myself. I know that several times in my life I have dreamed about events, or about people, that years later happened or showed up in my life just as I had dreamed.

I dreamed about my best friend and had her age, appearance, and country of origin, years before I ever met her.

Where did I get that information? I believe that I was born with it. I believe that some people and events are set before we get here, BUT how we handle life is completely up to us.

It seems commonplace in some circles these days to say that we chose our parents, made some kind of sacred contract… For some reason, all that doesn’t resonate with me. I don’t feel it… I am 37 now and my mother died 11 years ago. I would give almost anything to have her back. Did i choose a parent who would die suddenly? Why would a soul choose such tests? My example is one small example among many– The world is a harsh and lonely place

I suppose, someday, we’ll all know the answer to the question..

Well, I think we’re dealt a certain hand of cards, but there are certainly more than 52 in the deck and more than five players at the table. Part of destiny is luck, and the other part is how well you consciously play your hand. It helps to be nice to the dealer (karma).

I am uncomfortable w/the sentiment of choosing one’s lot. Suggesting that ppl who live through severe conditions like being gang raped by rebel Sudanese soldiers or being murdered because they’re gay or surviving Hiroshima ground zero until dying of radiation sickness a month later etc. wouldn’t want to trade in their suffering b/c it’s something they choose is a bit much. I think these events didn’t have to happen and there is no fated meaning in them (even though we can create meaning from them).

This kind of thinking when taken too far displaces responsibility for needless human suffering that has an obvious political/social root. Did the Iraqi people choose their current plight? OK, but I think most people would say US foreign policy had a significant role to play in shaping Iraqi history and that this history was not set in stone.

I don’t think we should get rid of all suffering. But I think the situations I’ve described are somehow different, more complex and can’t just be explained by individual soul choices or something to that effect. If people are truly choosing their circumstances, all I can say is there’s a lot of unnaturally BAD circumstances to go around these days and lucky to those few who chose to be born into a citizenship and social class where they can have access to most of the world’s resources.

Isthmus, I can see where your objections come from regarding this idea, but the bad circumstances you speak of are often experiences of the collective that are individualized through narrative.
However I experience this life as an individual, I am still part of the Whole. I am the whole. There is no separation, for me, between myself and those who have abused me.
Of course, there are more people than not who have suffered more than comprehension allows, and I would never suggest that they should develop their way of thinking to conform to mine.

By recreation I meant reincarnation. Hahaha, maybe that was some kind of slip.

Hey Isthmus,

I didn’t think your original post was inflammatory. I thought you did a good job of pointing out the hard reality of the world, and how easy it is to think about “whether we chose our circumstances” when we can scrape extra food off our plates into the trash after dinner.

However, the idea of choosing your ORIGINS versus your entire life’s circumstances… that doesn’t absolve any responsibility to the collective. If we do pick our origins, maybe that makes us even more accountable for what we do with our lives.

I’ve spent a lot of time pondering free will vs. fate, and since I believe in both, that was the best answer I could come up with.