Mars Square Venus… Boldly Wrought

21 Responses to “Mars Square Venus… Boldly Wrought”

1. max says on 11/20/07 at 8:26 pm:
   

   I tormented every man who’d ever loved me until he left me: I called them on everything, never let anything go, held them up to accountability in ways that wearied us both.

   What do you think?

   She doesn’t look familiar, but boy, it sure seems like I dated her.

   max
   [’This comment is all my fault.’]

2. Marc says on 11/21/07 at 12:26 am:
   

   I think this can apply to many relationships — its usually a lot easier to blame the other than take responsibility for our own stuff.

3. Carrie says on 11/21/07 at 1:07 am:
   

   Ouch!

   I have a natal Venus/Mars square and a lot of what she said resonated with me.

   I’m hard on my men……I thought it was because i wanted a partner who was my intellectual, spiritual and emotional equal but, maybe, just maybe I embody this energy…this spirit of criticism??

   I’ll ponder it a bit more…..

4. Charlotte says on 11/21/07 at 1:12 am:
   

   Yeah, I have Mars square Venus as well. More evidence to the fact that the lonely life is the life for me. Get thee to a nunnery?

5. Carrie says on 11/21/07 at 1:58 am:
   

   But i don’t like being alone

   Is it really bad to have this aspect? Anyone?

6. nia says on 11/21/07 at 2:39 am:
   

   I love what she wrote. So honest and courageous. Takes courage to admit when we have been strangling love.

   Carrie- I am married to someone with a natal Mars-Venus square and I can’t say he’s ever been a lonely man. As long as you choose where to fight your battles with some degree of wisdom, and aren’t completely closed to compromise then you’re going to be just fine.

7. june says on 11/21/07 at 3:24 am:
   

   when i was younger, i met a lot of girls with natal venus square mars… and i am so glad i do not have that in my chart. maybe it was a product of being young and growing into self, but it was like one drama after another with them.

8. Carrie says on 11/21/07 at 5:06 am:
   

   Thanks Nia

   Thanks to my Pisces Moon, I’m a good, healthy compromiser…

9. Eme Kah says on 11/21/07 at 7:24 am:
   

   I love Vivian Gornick! She’s one of my former writing teachers and, man, was she TOUGH. But a great unappreciated writer and, actually, extremely engaging and appealing in person, fierce as she is (and I do mean she’s FIERCE). Please read all her books, people. She’s really wonderful and as tough as she was on her men, she’s tough on herself as a person and as a writer. I’m sure it was brutal to live with, both as a partner and as herself.

10. Karin says on 11/21/07 at 7:43 am:
    

    This is a beautiful story about personal growth.
    It reminded me of a theory by CG Jung, the Swiss psychiatrist: All of us posess unconscious counterparts. A womans inner man is called Animus, a mans inner woman is called Anima. Realisation of these counterparts makes us complete. As long as we don’t use the energy, it manifests in a negative way.

    For example: A man out of touch with his Anima doesn’t acknowlegde his emotions, yet whines and behaves like a baby in personal matters.
    A woman becomes angry and domineering, while feeling helpless and divided.

    Men who’s Anima becomes conscious don’t mind to show their feelings and are compassionate. Women become more comfortable in their strength and use their authority without hurting others.

11. dreamsAreality says on 11/21/07 at 9:25 am:
    

    ahh, with age comes wisdom! I’m thankful for that as I’m in my birthday week here, hoping some of it will rub off on me.

12. Eme Kah says on 11/21/07 at 10:00 am:
    

    I also think it’s equally harmful to a relationship to go too far in the other direction and let your partner off the hook too easily. This is how some people turn a blind eye to their abusive or cheating spouse, after all. Balance is the hardest thing to achieve in a relationship.

13. Stephanie says on 11/21/07 at 11:10 am:
    

    My husband has this square in his natal chart, and he expresses it in the opposite direction — a complete negation of direct aggression in his interpersonal relationships. We’ve had lots of problems due to his passive aggression and submissive tendencies.

14. Hiro says on 11/21/07 at 12:12 pm:
    

    If I were to generalize, I would say that the majority of women blame men for their unhappiness. Whether they have a man or want a man, in their minds, it’s the man’s fault or lack of the man that causes their problems. I’m not saying that men don’t have half of the responsibility. I’m just saying they shouldn’t have it all. It goes back to the knight in shining armor dream of little girls. Wake up. It’s your life. Enjoy it and allow the knight with mustard on his shirt to sweep you off of your feet

15. t-carat says on 11/21/07 at 1:23 pm:
    

    Well….I don’t think the writer should blame all the problems on her ‘divided personality’. I mean…don’t we all have divided personalities. If you’re meant to have this dynamic / energy in your relationships you will. And whether they last forever or not I personally don’t connect to that. We can all find examples of vitriolic shrews who are in long-term marriages and will stay married and then we can find examples of nice, compromising, relationship-oriented women who are left by men (perhaps so they can go hump the leg of the vitriolic shrew). I think the fates are determining more about relationships than we give it (them?) credit for.

16. kashmiri says on 11/21/07 at 4:09 pm:
    

    “If I were to generalize, I would say that the majority of women blame men for their unhappiness.”

    Unless you are like me and have Sun square Saturn…then you blame yourself for everything, LOL!

17. DR says on 11/21/07 at 4:46 pm:
    

    Phew!(as a male). Men had a hard time under dinosaur feminism.

18. CD says on 11/21/07 at 6:36 pm:
    

    “There was, of course, more than a grain of truth in everything I said, but those grains no matter how numerous, need not have become the sandpile that crushed the life out of love.”

    That is BEAUTIFUL.

19. Carrie says on 11/22/07 at 12:29 am:
    

    Hey Karin - another name for these ‘unconscious counterparts’ is ‘blindspots’. We all have aspects of our personality which we don’t acknowlege.

    t-carat - I’m so with you. Sometimes ‘nice’ girls finish last. I honestly think it depends on the kind of man you’re dealing with but a vast majority of men almost welcome that ’shrew’ energy. It gives them something to ‘bitch’ about with the boys at the bar……

20. Shaina says on 11/22/07 at 2:53 am:
    

    I wonder if her Saturn and Uranus are in close contact too… or maybe squaring her Venus? Her chosen title is intriguing.

21. Lila says on 11/22/07 at 8:52 am:
    

    I have this in my chart and I’m confused. I’m just learning this now, how I could never let love grow; yet, when I think about what Eme Kah said, I was definitely with some tough men and always had to defend myself. Sometimes I blame myself for not being more open and loving and other times I count my lucky stars that I got out of there alive!

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