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Fighting The Fence Guy With Polite Lace While Holding Off Mars - Good Luck To Me: Pluto?
Astrology in Real Life…
goatish writes: “Have him put the posts on your side of the fence…”
goatish - maybe. It will look like hell though and I am not even sure it can be done because the cross pieces are on his side, so how to attach? I don’t know enough about fences…
I will go to the city tomorrow, I guess. The guy has escalated things today by taking down these slats he put up to replace some that have come off (I didn’t live here then), as threatened.
That’s fine… the slats belong on my side anyway and I am happy to replace them. But he obviously wants to play.
Thing is there are other men around me who also want to play:
“What’s in it for him? Well today, he gets a free fence repair and no dog shitting in his yard. What’s in for him tomorrow? A lawsuit and then he gets to pay. What’s in it for him the day after that if he still wants to be a bother? Well then I guess he’s going to get his ass kicked like he’s never had it kicked before and after that he’ll decide to leave you alone….”
Oh brother. And all of this sprung up out of nowhere. I have lived here for 7 out of 10 years and never seen this guy before in my life before yesterday. And it turns out, when you have a neighbor like this, ignorance is bliss! Because now there is some seething thing in my back yard. It’s so Pluto.
When Pluto transits your Moon you have to wonder about “death” at your house (Moon). And for awhile there… for more than a year, my daughter’s life was at serious risk. But now she seems okay. Seeeeeeems. And this other thing is forming and to call it merely “unnerving” would be an understatement.
Because just as I can’t control this neighbor, I also can’t control Mars. I can only use my own Mars, which is unfortunately broken in Libra which means I have to be nice, fair and of course, non-violent! I have to pretty much fight by spreading doilies all over the place and I dunno. I can do my best. I can be well-meaning all day but it’s like rain. If the clouds decide to rain, then the clouds decide to rain and the rain comes down.
On the upside (Libra balance) I did have a person remind me that historically speaking, I do tend to find ways to resolve things like this, which encouraged me. So I’m just hoping I can manage this again and all the sick foreboding is nothing but that… sick foreboding.
8 Responses to “Fighting The Fence Guy With Polite Lace While Holding Off Mars - Good Luck To Me: Pluto?”
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This all sounds very horrible
- like you said, what a Pluto / Moon experience. You know I think the world of you, so throw this out the window if it doesn’t fit….but this transit is important, and a psychological one that can transform parts of the inner psyche that the external environment reflects….and so here we have a power struggle with an a..hole who is being completely unfair and seeming to threaten your boundaries on all levels. I would suggest that your Mars in Libra has already proven how effective it can be, particularly using the system (courts) to verbally fight for (Mars / Mercury - if I’m remembering previous blog descriptions accurately) for justice and fairness! Your Mars is a master at that and nobody need ever invade your boundaries. Maybe this is an opportunity to really anchor that in….
Oh Melody, I agree. This guy will lose. As always they don’t know who they’re dealing with. If they had the slightest clue they’d they wouldn’t pull this stuff in the first place. It’s just getting the stomach up to fight.
And definitely happening on all levels. There is nothing like being alone with children and feeling vulnerable… yet at the same time knowing if you show up in my living room in the middle of the night… well I am capable of hurting you very badly. I’d just rather not!!! And you know how that goes. If you don’t want to fight you can almost be assured you will be made to.
This guy said, ‘Well I’ll just go get my hammer, then…”
In response to what? There were implied threats throughout the entire conversation. I stayed as long as I did just to be sure… you know. To gather evidence.
Anyway, I’m off to the city tomorrow, find out where the rules go (Moon in Cap) and meantime trying to act on intuition that is authentic… that is that originates from some place that is not fear-based.
IOW - Jupiter guide me. I pay attention to that - I should be protected. And my kids? Well I think about them and it creates all kinds of fear. Not good. I think faith (neptune) and do the right thing (Saturn) is my best tack. That and deal with my roiling Pluto stomach the best I can…
And ps - these other players are part of the “ecosystem” as well. It seems I have to let them operate. IOW all attempts to control (Saturn) will be futile (Neptune) so do the right thing and give it to God?
Thing is God sends men who like to punch things!
Elsa, I think you hit the nail on the head when you said you needed to learn more about fences!
Either the fence is on your side, or on his. There is a legal property line, and if you don’t know where it is then that is where you need to start.
Find out where the legal property line is. Hopefully this can be done without surveyors, but if you need to, do it! (Btw, it is ALWAYS good to know exactly where your property starts and finishes, not just for fences!) Then you’ll know which side the fence is on. If it is on yours, then there is no dispute–just get the fence fixed! If it is on his, then yes, to do anything to the fence you need to either leave it alone and hope he does it himself, or get him to sign a contract stating that he will allow you to fix *his* fence. If the fence is on both sides, then it should never have been built there in the first place–ideally it should be torn down and then replaced on one side only. If the neighbor won’t agree, then legal help might need to be obtained–you certainly have a right to remove a fence on your side! You just wouldn’t have the right to remove anything on *his* side…but if the fence is in bad repair and a potential hazard, it might not be at all difficult to obtain a writ to have it removed, anyway.
Who owns the property you live on? Who owns his? When property is bought, usually it is required to also purchase title insurance. Title insurance will guarantee things like, “property X has a legal right to access the property via property Y”. Somewhere is a piece of paper saying what each lot is, and whether any special easements or other considerations are attached to it. And the title insurance gives protection in case any of those considerations are violated. I doubt there is anything about any fences (too minor, unless there is something truly special about the fence or its placement), but unless your neighbor can come up with a signed contract or other legal easement regarding that fence, then it legally belongs to whoever’s property it lies on.
The other thing to know is whether the properties are part of a larger block, subject to rules by the city or county or other homeowner association. For example, my beau owns a lot and house in a neighborhood where not only are they bound by regular city rules, but also an additional neighborhood specific covenant which disallows certain things (such as parking a camper on the street–it has to be on the property itself).
Yes, this might end up being a lot of trouble for you to find these answers. The fence guy might have to wait just awhile. But I’m guessing your neighbor is probably somewhat ignorant, too–he may have no idea whose fence it really is! And the fact that the slats are on your side indicates the fence was probably orginally built by whoever owned the property you now live on. And that he had put up a few slats on his side (and now has taken them down) might indicate that he’s pretty certain that the fence *isn’t* his (but that at one point he was tired of staring at a broken fence and so did a token something toward fixing it), and he really has no right to do anything about it! He’s just afraid that you’ll do something that ends up being worse than a fence that is falling apart…or ask him to help pay for a fence that isn’t his!
So. Find out whose fence it really is. Then, if it is yours, just tell the neighbor you’re fixing it. If he says, “fine, but don’t you dare step foot on my property doing it!!!” then either ask fence guy to avoid neighbor’s side, or else you hand him a paper signed by you & your repair guy that guarantees no damage will occur to neighbor’s property and then TAKE PHOTOS of BEFORE, DURING, and AFTER as proof that he has nothing to bitch about. And also get neighbor guy to sign afterward stating that yes, you really didn’t harm anything.
If the fence is his, then build your own. He can’t say diddly about it, as long as you stay on your side of the property line and don’t break any other rules about fence building by law as it applies to YOUR property. And then get all your neighbors to sign a complaint about his nasty, broken fence and a request that it be removed, and file it with your local city/county office. ::smirk::
Sorry for the long post, but the law (Saturn!) is the law, and as long as you’ve got it on your side then Pluto and Mars can only posture, they can’t actually hurt you. And so you can keep your nicey-nice smile after all. :>
tinkerer - I am going to call the city tomorrow like I said, but for the record, I am pretty sure the fence is on the property line… the entire subdivision shares the same fence. It is blocks long… runs between the backyards with no easement or alley.
This is why no one knows exactly who is responsible and people just split the cost when a repair is necessary which it is all over the neighborhood since it’s a common fence and just plain degraded from age.
So I could put up a new fence inside the old fence, but fact is I am poor! I am a single mother with a sick kid and lots of bills so when something like this happens I hope for a fix that is as low stress as possible, which is what occurred with my other neighbors. I never in a million years expected what I got yesterday. I actually thought I was going to go over and meet my neighbor… happily. Spring thaw, right?
Especially did not expect a conflict when I went over there already willing to pay for everything. However, I have one so I will deal with, same way I deal with everything… the best way I can.
Good luck Elsa! And a very thoughtful post by tinkerer, hopefully some of it will come in handy.
Oh. How incredibly weird. About the fence, that is. Blocks long? Hm. How annoyingly ambiguous. I understand the part about single parenthood and $$ issues all too well, tho’!
So maybe you should just let the Mars fence guy punch him. Why not? He deserves it.
Meanwhile, I’ll hope that your call to the city yields results. Y’know, something like “oh yes–that fence is bound by neighbohood covenant, and residents are *required* to maintain it or risk citation and jail time. Shall we send a police officer to your resistant neighbor’s house to explain this?”
Heh. That would be better than a punch in the face.
Oh yeah, and although I’m sorry you have such a creepy neighbor, do consider that it maybe is a better thing to know who’s a creep and who is safe. Especially with kids to protect. That is one thing I learned early on in my neighborhood (which isn’t the greatest…we’ve had our share of drug busts, theft, jailbird residents, and even a murder half a block away)–who my kid could run to if something upsetting happened, and which houses to keep an eye on!
So YUK to have a Pluto living nearby. But…better to know than to have him rise from the underworld unexpectedly and do harm beyond being nasty about a fence!