I was talking to a pal about my new discoveries courtesy Saturn’s transit through my 7th house (boundaries in relationship)

“Well I am seeing it makes no difference what other people think or feel about me. I have found this out and I’ll give you an example.”

“Okay.”

“Take the soldier. He’s loved me his whole life but would be hard pressed to tell you why. Oh, he could tell you a couple things but basically he has no idea why he loves me and either do I. He just does.”

“Okay.”

“I asked him. Because he goes on and on about how he loves me and you know what he said?”

“What?”

“He said of all the girls in the world, I’m the one who has birds flying around her head that makes boys want to kiss her.”

She laughed.

“Yeah, he said that. This is what he conjures up when he thinks of me so what should I do about it? Should I argue this with him? Should I tell him there are no birds when he’s seen them flying there all his life? For that matter, should I tell him I am a woman, not a girl?” I snorted. “Do you think I should I break this to him? Argue this with him?”

“It wouldn’t do any good.” (She’s Pisces, she’d know.)

“Yeah, I don’t think it would either. He’s thinks what he thinks and he’s had his whole life to figure it out. So if he thinks there are birds flying around, then that’s fine. But here’s the trick.”

“What’s the trick?’

“I realized just because he thinks this or he feels this, it has no bearing whatsoever on what I think or feel. You know…. oh! If you feel that about me, then I better think and feel this about you. It doesn’t work that way. He thinks what he thinks and it’s interesting. I like it, I am amused but it has no bearing on what my thoughts and feelings are. What I think and feel is completely independent.”

“I see.”

“Yeah. How he feels about me does not change how I feel about him but it also doesn’t change how I feel about myself! Just because he thinks I am special and have birds around my head, does not mean I think I am special and have birds around my head.” I laughed. “I just feel like my regular self. My regular mixture of glee and angst, I feel whatever I feel.”

“I see.”

“So finding this out has been grand. He sees me and sees birds flying around my head. I see him and want to screw. There are no birds in my equation,” I said with a snort.

She laughed.

“And it’s been a big revelation. I feel exactly how I feel regardless of anything. Regardless of all the love in the world, or all the hate. I remain this entity - Elsa. And whether this is true of everyone or it makes me a freak, I don’t know. But anyway, there’s my Saturn transit through the 7th. There is separation between me and the other. I have integrity and so do they. It’s a pretty good thing to know at least it has been for me. I feel better than I ever have in my life, I’ll tell you that.”