This afternoon, we’re on the phone. The soldier is a Pisces Rising, with Moon Neptune in Scorpio in the 8th House :

“You know how I remember things with music?” he said.

“Yeah.”

“Yep. That’s how I make sue I never forget the things I want to remember and I had to go to the store today and get some more songs. You have some new songs, Miss P. To go with your old songs. Songs and more songs. So I got my songs. You know I have to have these songs and I was leaving the store with my cd’s and I realized one of them was the wrong thing. It someone else singing song of the artist I wanted. You know. Muzak. Well, hell. That’s not right. So that one’ll be a Frisbee and I had to go back in the store.”

“Yeah.”

“Yeah. I don’t want muzak. I want the songs that I want. I just gotta have them, so back in the store and then on the way out, there’s these girl scouts selling cookies.”

“Oh no.”

“Right. Girl scouts. And you know how I am about girls. I just can’t say no to them. I don’t want any damned cookies. I have my songs, which is what I was after but they ask you with those big eyes and oh lord; now I have to buy some cookies.”

“Yeah…”

“So I ask them what kind they recommend and they all start blabbering.” He laughs. “You know. They’re girls. They’re little girls and you have to do whatever they want. There is just no other choice in the world, so now I have some cookies I don’t want and some songs I do want.”

“Okay.”

“So anyway, you have some new songs, P!” he said, happily. “You have,” he names the song. “And I got this other one… that one is about you and the AMF.”

“I see. Really? Interesting.”

“Well yeah, P. These are your songs, man. They remind me of you. These are your songs and now they’re my songs. I’ve got them like I’ve been doing, um… forever. That’s how long I’ve been collecting these songs. So anyway, P. I’ve got to go. I’m going to go have some pizza and then I’m going to listen to these songs.”

“‘Kay.”

“You have a good day. Bye!” he said in his twang. *click

The soldier associates his emotion (Moon) not only with songs but with movies (Neptune) and he is tremendously fed in this way. Personally I am overwhelmed by this kind of thing.

For example, he sent me a movie he associates with our relationship, but only after he’d watched it 30 or 40 times which is hard for me to fathom, outside of the fact I know that he likes this. He enjoys this kid of thing completely, and in contrast, when he sent me the movie it took me several weeks to watch it. And when I did watch it, I was deeply affected as expected. And when the movie ended, I put the dvd away as if I were handling TNT, thinking I might watch it again in case there was something I missed, but not for ten or maybe twenty years. I just can’t handle this stuff.

I seem to have a limit how long I can stay immersed in intense emotion, even if it’s pleasant. The soldier seems to be in this condition almost constantly. It’s as if he lives and thrives in the soup, or in the sea where I have just take a dip and get back to dry land!

What is your status on this? Are you comfortable swirling? Or are you more like me, preferring to touch the stuff and then get the hell out?

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