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Astrology and Manipulation in Relationships Redux - Gaslighting: Who Is Most Susceptible?
Catch up here - Psychological Games…
So on being game-y, my friend said she got a lot of power from doing this. She had control. And via the comments it seems we may not all be talking about the same thing, so let me clarify.
My friend would engage a man. She would be very attentive to him, leading him to believe she was really interested in knowing him. Then, as soon as she had him hooked, she would detach.
So the man would come after her… after all, she loved him yesterday, didn’t she? And when he presented himself, thinking he had forged some kind of connection with her, the day before, or two days before, she would act aloof! She would treat him with some degree of coolness which would have the effect of undermining him… on all levels.
It’s akin to gaslighting. “Didn’t she just like me yesterday? Did I imagine that?”
And the person who was showered with attention initially is now confused. It’s very painful.
And think about the position this puts my friend in. She’s got all the power, see? She can give pleasure and she can take it away and the man just has to stand there befuddled.
Anyway, she said her behavior was completely driven by her insecurities at the time and this makes sense. Because if you trust you are a desirable person you can meet someone on a level playing field and take your chances. But here’s the other thing…
Some people are enormously susceptible to this kind of thing, and I’m one of them. I’ve got Venus Neptune for starters, so how easy is it going to be to confuse me in relationship? All I need is a whiff!
Add to that my Saturn / Neptune personality… well remember, Bill Clinton’s claim around pot smoking? “I smoked it but I didn’t inhale.”
My version would be, “He smoked it and I got high!” 
And is Venus in aspect with Neptune in your chart? How about Saturn?
15 Responses to “Astrology and Manipulation in Relationships Redux - Gaslighting: Who Is Most Susceptible?”
Oh yeah, I never gaslight anyone. I love keeping them guessing, but I do not manipulate or get one over on them with it.
I have been gaslighted by someone who was quite adept at it when I was younger and now I can spot them like crazy. Saturn, Neptune, Venus grand trine in water signs and water houses. You have to be pretty slippery to confuse me at this point.
Now if we were talking about getting caught while being 100% aware you are caught - that’s a whole different story. *she says as she digs out the remnants of that last hook*
Well, Sag. Neptune & Jupiter conjunct (& in) 1st house opposing Saturn in Gemini 7th - lol, you tell me. When i’m in love it takes great discipline to see remotely clearly … sigh.
I often choose people who gaslight. family of origin thing. I know what they’re doing and deny it to myself cos I don’t want to think they suck. I’m getting better at telling myself the truth though.
I have a neptune-jupiter-chiron/saturn grand trine in water, no venus contact.
I’m very hard to gaslight, but only because I am so phenomenally stubborn! I am quite sure that things are ~exactly~ as I perceive them, and will argue endlessly unless shown concrete evidence to the contrary.
Unless I’m just sick of it all, in which case I’ll mouth an agreement to to make the other person shut up. A la, “Yeah, whatever. Think what you want - I know I’m right!”
Venus in Libra conjunct Mars and Pluto, trine Neptune.
I avoid gaslighters like the plague - and I have never had to suffer as a result. I don’t like it when people mess with me. That said, I am more prone to gaslighting myself, and that IS a problem. In my own mind imagination and reality mix, and that’s a dangerous tricky thing in itself. Saturn square Neptune.
I have venus opposite neptune, Tsquared with jupiter - definately like taking candy from a baby, especially with my aries moon 
“My friend would engage a man. She would be very attentive to him, leading him to believe she was really interested in knowing him. Then, as soon as she had him hooked, she would detach.”
That I couldn’t do. If I was very interested in him it’s real - I can’t just switch it off to make him “come hither”.
“Didn’t she just like me yesterday? Did I imagine that?”
Not something I can do to someone. It’s just mean. Yes, she has the power, but from where I stand she isn’t using it properly. People who have tried doing this to me never, ever, get a second chance. It hasn’t happened often, thankfully.
Venus in Pisces (9th) is trine Neptune in Scorpio (5th). Saturn in Pisces (9th) is widely conjunct Venus and trine Neptune.
Coming back to this post to add that I had someone attempt to gaslight me in a pretty big way yesterday. I didn’t even have time to begin to doubt myself before I remembered this post and saw right through the attempt.
*laughs @ Lupa* This has been a service of the Elsa Emergency Support Network. 
I’ve fallen to this behavior time and time again, and unless I get someone who is extraordinarily honest and will tell me how he feels up front with no frills, I get confused, and confusion leads to erratic, pessimistic/optimistic behavior.
Until I found your blog I didnt even know the effects of those aspects!
I have venus in taurus,saturn in gemini,conjunct in the 12th both in opposition to my neptune in saggitarius.Friggen explains a helluva lot!
wondered how i could be so damn intelligent and fall for so much sh*t!!!
well…wish i knew a bit more now about my chart!
I tend to “carry” relationships through my sheer will/love/faith….even if they are limping and crippled.Its like a bizaar form of blind fierce loyalty…and I go into the “universal love” place of forgiveness so quickly…like a saint and end up getting taken for granted/advantage of without even knowing it!
If a Mercurian is targeted, the Mercurian will win.
Me?
Pisces Moon to the 7th… Still a Mercurian, still will see and win in mind games, and indeed I have and do.
I don’t trust the guy I’m seeing. I suspect he’s a gaslighter to a slight degree. I can’t pinpoint this exactly. What does this type of behavior stem from? The need to be in control? Is the case “Once a gaslighter, always a gaslighter” true? If someone is “the occasional gaslighter” does it get worse over time?
I need more info on this. It scares the shit out of me.
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Neptune (12th, Sag) trined Saturn (7th, Leo) and Venus (3rd, Aries).
I have only been tricked once, and man did it upset me. A man I was friends with and in love with told me that his live-in partner had moved out. I had no way of knowing that he was lying. They had his mobile phone and nothing else.
I slept with him, and he went cold. Beyond cold! He acted like I didn’t exist. I was 19 with zero sexual experience, and he was over 30. I was devestated.
I can smell gaslighters a mile away now.