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She’s Pregnant, Her Boyfriend’s Mother Ignores Her: 9th House Sun In Leo
Hi Elsa,
I’ve been in a relationship with my boyfriend for about 3 years now. We lived at his mother’s house for the first year and when I got a good job, I told my boyfriend we should move out and live on our own together. Last August I got pregnant. I’m due in May.
I never had any problem with his Mom . But though she likes to talk to her son, when we visit she treats me as if I don’t exist at all. She only calls us when she needs help financially. I never had the courage to tell her this, because I do respect her.
Recently she told my boyfriend that since I’m pregnant, we should move back to her house and live in the basement. Personally I do not want to live with her again. Living with her makes me crazy. She only cares about herself and not about whether my boyfriend or I get hurt. I never told my boyfriend how I feel about his mother because I know it will upset him, He is considering the option to move with his mom again because I’m pregnant, but honestly I do not even want to be anywhere near her. What should I do, Elsa???
I cry at night every day and my boyfriend doesn’t know about it. Sometimes I feel like I’m alone… just me and my baby. I don’t know why we don’t get along. I never treated his mom bad. I’m always the quiet one and whatever she says, I just ignore it. I haven’t told my parents about it either, because I do not want them to be worried about me. I feel like I chose this road and I should be mature enough to handle it. Please give me an advice, Elsa. What to do in this situation. Should I move back to his mom’s house?
Pregnant Girlfriend
Philippines
Dear Girlfriend,
No! Don’t even think about it. Not only do you not need to be around his mother, you’re a Leo having a child! And the last thing you need is to live in a basement… ever! You stay in the sunshine, okay? Have your baby in the light!
But aside from that - just as a general rule, it’s never a good idea to go towards something that makes you crazy. This is particularly true when you are somebody’s mother, because parenting is very hard and you need to be sane to do it! So it’s good that this is coming up. Because having a baby is a big deal that requires you change your life completely. So this is a chance for you to make some good, positive changes and I have complete faith you can do exactly that. So here’s your key:
You are a sane person: kind, caring, generous and giving. We can all see this from your post. So next time you want to know what to do, you do not have to ask me. You need only check your feelings and do what feels good and right, because what feels good and right, is good and right. And what is good and right for you is going to be good and right for your baby. And your boyfriend’s mother?
Well she should be supporting you, not the other way around. You do what you want, but considering she ignores you anyway, I think it would be completely reasonable to tell your boyfriend he’s on his own when he wants to visit his mother. See if this doesn’t encourage her to change her behavior. Because she does not show you the respect you deserve, which is another thing mothers can’t do Allow their children to see them be mistreated, that is.
Bottom line, I think you have a good , solid heart. If you vow to go with that, you’re going to be fine.
Good luck.
~~
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4 Responses to “She’s Pregnant, Her Boyfriend’s Mother Ignores Her: 9th House Sun In Leo”
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Dear Pregnant, I have to agree with Elsa! You sound like a wonderful person and I just cannot imagine you moving yourself (and baby) into this woman’s basement. It’s just not healthy for either one of you.
There has been much research done on prenatal care and what psychologists have found is that a baby(fetus) is well aware of the moods of his mother. If you are crying and sad all of the time he will absorb this and more than likely be born very melancholy. My first son cried incessantly for 3 months after birth. He would not eat or sleep most of the time. His father and I used to fight and argue most of the time (when he was around) which always ended with me in tears.
I’m not saying your boyfriend is anything like my ex but he must respect the mother of his child by giving her peace and support….1000%!
You NEED to be good to yourself right now and for the rest of your life because whatever you do to yourself will impact your beautiful child for the rest of his/her life.
It is not easy to block out the noise of those that do not have our best interest at heart and your right about this woman not caring about anyone but herself at this point….but you have to block out her noise.
Do not cry anymore. Your courage and sense of duty to your loved ones will command the support of those that are worthy to be a part of this wonderful event. I send love, light and respect your way.
It uplifted me too, I don’t know why.
Being a mother should empower you to love yourself more than ever, and everyone will follow when you do. I’m sure you will be a great mother Pregnant Girlfriend.
and tell your partner how you feel about living in that basement! he needs to know that you don’t want to be there, even if the “why” is uncomfortable for him - and for you to admit. living with the inlaws can be hell all by itself, nevermind once you work a child into the picture, and have to start dealing with “advice” on how to be a parent.
you’re not alone, my dear. you have a partner. talk to him…
I recommend you read the book “Boundaries” by Cloud/Townsend. you need to run not walk from this woman. I have a 4 year old son and my mother in law never liked me and things will never improve and her behavior is inexcusable. i thought things would get better after my son was born and it never did. You would be better off living in an homeless shelter than with this individual. She will never support you,your pregnancy or even your child. my mother in law has a very two-faced attitude toward me and my children. lift yourself up to a higher vibration and stay away from this lady. Save Yourself!!