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Am I Doomed? Jealous Scorpio Moon with Pluto In Scorpio Wants To Know: Part Three
As for motivation towards striving to contain yourself, this is the bottom line: if you don’t, then all your fears will manifest!
Seriously, they will. How could they not? Take the jealousy. I’ll use myself as an example, okay? So you can have some distance.
I am a jealous motherfucker! At least I have been in the past. And these days I transcend my jealousy for the most part, but it’s still there!!! Just yesterday, the AMF and I were talking about some gal sniffing around him.
“And I was going to tell her, you better stay back,” he said. “Stay away from me, because my girl will kill you.”
I blushed. “That’s right!” I said. “I will kill her with just one evil glance.”
And we were kidding… sort of.
The point is, I have jealous feelings too, from time to time. But I recognize them as irrational and have learned to toss them off. And I have definitely learned not to act on them.
And I don’t just mean I don’t bug my man. I don’t bug myself! I talk myself down instead. Like this:
“Yeah, so you’re jealous. And you know it’s ridiculous, so knock it off. There is nothing stupider than what you’re doing so just let it go… let it pass.”
And I have learned to do this. Reliably! And if you can do the same, I’ll tell you how it ends up.
Well, first: if you don’t learn to do this, you actually are doomed. You will drive your lovers away one after another, when the heat generated by your paranoia and accusations becomes intolerable. On the other hand, if you do… well your energy is very powerful. It’s very alluring when it’s not cutting someone’s throat. It attracts people and that’s all there is to say about it. Magnetic is the word!
So basically you will always be able to pull someone in. But if you can take responsibility for your intense feelings - manage your dark side, that is - then you will be a compelling partner. You will be a person someone will be overjoyed to have located and when this happens, you will not have to worry about them leaving you - ever. And Ill tell you how this works.
I want to run with The AMF who has four planets in Scorpio, half of them square Pluto. As part of the package, I can expect him isolate on occasion. I can expect him to spend days brooding from time to time, regardless of what I am up to. I trust him not to blame me for his dark days. He trusts that I’ll still love him when he’s not what he calls, “yippy skippy”.
He wants to run with me. He can expect me to have a jealous spike, from time to time. He trusts me not to go crazy with it, etc.
See how this is? We’re both jacked up, along with everyone else on this planet. But we have something very good. So I just want you to know it’s possible. But how do you get from here to there?
It’s going to take me one more blog. Tomorrow.
~~
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3 Responses to “Am I Doomed? Jealous Scorpio Moon with Pluto In Scorpio Wants To Know: Part Three”
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I’ve had the jealousy problem for years and you’re absolutely right, all of my fears manifested in most of my now failed relationships. I have Venus in Scorpio and can see why I felt the way I did. I no longer let it get to me (as much). Whatever will be, will be is pretty much my (love) motto now.
Hrm. Yeah, how do you get from here to there?
98% of the time, I don’t bug my man - I seethe quietly for a bit then let it go. Right now (the other 2%) it’s not working and I’m exploding all over the place. Yargh! I think we’re both frustrated and tired by this, since most of the time our relationship is very harmonious.
Give up the goods, babe!
Jealousy is a weird thing. I blame the Uranus conjunct my Scorpio Moon for my lifelong battle with my nature’s primal, darker urges.For years and years and years I dissociated so much from the Scorpio that I swore I had no anger or jealousy or possessiveness at all (but especially no anger).
It’s been a long process to tap into that, and I remember the first time I unleashed some of my pent up frustration in an arguement - I slammed something loudly on the table- and how it’s transformed my urges for self-destruction into anger directed outwards. Sometimes I take a step back to just contemplate my surreal transition from a person who never got mad at anyone ever and was always reasonable and calm, to the person who tells my partner directly when he ticks me off and sends him looks of dire and bleak warning that are more effective than verbal communication.
On the other hand, jealousy is still something that I very much struggle with. As far as I’ concerned it’s an ugly, unnecessary emotion and it’s a real battle between my rational side and the feelings that undoubtedly exist despite being unattractive and unnecessary. So it’s a battle to try and connect with that jealousy rather than cement it somewhere deep down and deny it even exists.
Even when I’m not in rabid denial that jealousy exists I am not a hugely jealous person. I don’t assume things will go wrong and that I’ll be betrayed (I think it really helped me that I was betrayed because it taught me that I can survive it, so there’s no point in having all this stress about it trying to control it out of ever occuring).
At the heart of it probably is that infidelity is not at the core of my relationship fears. I will be furiously angry at any deception because its a betrayal of trust, but if I found out I was cheated on then although partially I’d be undoubtedly angry, I’d also be looking forward to having a convenient excuse to stop all that tedious monogamy business and enjoy some cute people of the world.
Maybe it’s the mix of water and air in my chart. My Scorpio Moon trine Saturn rewards loyalty by being loyal and steadfast in return but the Venus in Gemini opposite Neptune is flighty and flirty and fully capable of loving many people at the same time.
It’s weird - I’m tactile anyway, so I’m always having some point of physical contact with my partner even if it’s just our feet touching. On the other hand he of the Saggi Sun and |Venus in Capricorn and Taurus Ascendant is much more posessive than I am and had the challenge of adjusting his thinking to accomodate my male friends.
he was a nightmare actually because I remember trying to ask him about what his relationship needs were and he’d be all Sun-conjunct-Neptune “Well I don’t know… and I don’t want to constrain you in any ways… surely if I put down boundaries that would be wrong…” and it took me a long long time of lying in wait to catch his inner fish and get some clear answers out of them.